Buying Your First Vibrator

Buying Your First Vibrator

I was interviewed on Holistic Sex Ed podcast the other day and one of the interview questions was, “Should a mom buy her teenage daughter a vibrator?”. Hmm…

My opinion is that we should be open with our children, as long as it is age-appropriate, about masturbation and exploring their bodies. How else we ever move out of a culture of sexual shame? Of course, I think a mom should introduce the idea of a vibrator to her teenage daughter. I always recommend being as honest as possible with our teens about sex education and answering their questions. It’s important to validate their feelings and to normalize sex.

My friend Nicole, coincidentally the same name as myself, shared her story with me of her first vibrator. “I was like 16. It was a bullet in the shape of a lipstick. It was so slick. I bought it at a sex shop, snuck it into my house and kept it under my bed.” Nicole was so afraid that her parents would hear her using it. She went to tell me, “My mom must have found it and thrown it away, but she had the decency not to bring it up.” I asked if her mom really knew what her lipstick vibrator was, “Um, 100,000% mom knew what that thing was.”

Let’s start talking more about how sex education is beyond the words, “Don’t get pregnant!” and demonstrating how to wear a condom on a banana. Sex education includes self-pleasure, validating feelings, and giving permission to be uninhibited. It’s really important to give our daughters and ourselves the confidence to let go and to explore our bodies. We all deserve great sex!

Another friend, Noel, stole her parents’ back massager when she was 11 or 12. Her mom figured out what she was doing with it and she was chastised. She carried that hurt and the feelings of guilt through many years of shutting down her desires. She didn’t buy one for herself until she was in her late 30’s because she didn’t want to hurt her ex-husband’s feelings.

Girlfriend, don’t wait until you’re in your late 30s to start experiencing mind-blowing orgasms! There is no shame in masturbation and when there’s a vibrator involved, ah-mazing things happen!

So, you’re ready to buy your first vibrator.

I know, there are tons of choices and shopping for a vibrator can be totally overwhelming! For starters, there are so many kinds! Even if you’re buying it online, it’s normal to feel slightly overwhelmed with all the choices, kinds, brands, and models of different vibrators and sex toys. Unlike buying a pair of jeans (already a headache, IMO), you can’t simply return a vibrator if it’s less than what you hoped for. But with the right background knowledge and education, you can narrow down what you’re looking for, which can significantly reduce any stress and anxiety you have about buying your first vibe.

Start by asking yourself lots of questions about how you’ll be using it. Will you be using it in the bed only? Do you want the option to be able to use it in the shower or tub? If so, you’ll need to find something waterproof, shower-friendly, and cordless (natch). Are you intending on just using it solo, or do you also want something you can use with a partner?

Shopping for a sex toy online can also pose a lot of advantages for first time buyers. You’ll want to look at the descriptions and check out the features of the toy such as:

  • Is it waterproof?
  • Does it have a USB charger?
  • The materials. What materials is it made from? Body-safe is best, which can mean anything from medical-grade, body-safe silicone, glass, stainless steel, etc.
  • The reviews.

My favorite online resource is Lovehoney. Here are some of my favorites from Lovehoney. By clicking on the link, you will get my special discount of 15% and I will get a small commission. Thanks, Love!

The Magic Wand

Magic Wand Rechargeable Extra Powerful Cordless Vibrator

One of the most popular first vibrators is the Magic Wand. Forget hand massages. When you think iconic vibrators, you have to think of the Magic Wand. Often colloquially referred to as “The Hitachi,” the toy has a storied history going back to the late ’60s and is known to be symbolic of the sex-positive feminist movement of the ’70s.

The Magic Wand has been a favorite of sex-toy enthusiasts for 40-plus years for good reason. You can shake your whole house from its very foundations with the jaw-rattling judder of this extra-powerful wand. Your cordless Magic Wand harnesses AC power from the wall before firing it out in 8 vibration styles. Brace yourself.

A sex-drawer staple.

The Rabbit Vibrator


Lovehoney Power Play 10 Function Silicone G-Spot Rabbit Vibrator

Not tried a rabbit vibrator before? You’ll soon find out why a recent survey by Lovehoney found them to be the second most sought-after sex toy for women to own after a conventional vibrator. 

“Rabbit vibrators are great for beginners, since they come in a wide variety of sizes and features,” says Lindsay Phillips, sex expert at Lovehoney. “One thing many people say about rabbit vibrators is that they tend to orgasm very quickly the first time they use one. And that, of course, isn’t such a bad thing!”

You *can* have it all!

The Clit Sucker

Womanizer’s suction vibrators have inspired a host of relatively inexpensive competitors, but our tester found that the original is still the best, if you’re willing to make the investment. The Womanizer Classic offers a pulsing suction sensation that differs from traditional vibration and that many have compared to the sensation of oral sex. The contoured shape of the attachment that fits over the clitoris is what sets the Womanizer Classic apart from its imitators, offering the most comfortable and precise stimulation of all similar models.

~Targeted ~ Clit Stim~

Sex toys can be life-changing, but shopping for them can be intimidating, especially for people who have never bought one before.

Above all else, know that it’s totally fine to ask questions in my private Facebook Group, by email, or right here in the comments. If you feel awkward about the shopping experience, talk to me! I will encourage you and guide you in the direction you need to find the right toy for you.

🤩🤩🤩

Nicole Buratti is an internationally recognized Sex Expert. She is the creator and author of The GEMMA Method®, a sex writer and speaker. Nicole is available for private sex, dating, and relationship coaching. Connect with her HERE.

Ready to learn more? Want to be a guest on my show?  Let’s TALK today!

Have a SEX question you want answered on the show or on my Facebook Live? MESSAGE me here.

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